Your girlfriend has stopped talking to you. For a few moments, this may seem like something of a blessing, especially if it comes in the middle of a heated argument. At any other time, it will seriously worry you, as it should. Part of being in a healthy, balanced, and fulfilling relationship is spending time talking to your partner on a daily basis. If several days go by and there is no news from the woman you are involved with, a big red flag should fly over your head. Their relationship is rapidly heading for disaster. If you don’t fully understand what it means when your girlfriend suddenly fades into the distance, now is the time for you to get a much needed insight into what she is thinking and feeling.
If your girlfriend is suddenly out of sight and you haven’t heard a word from her, think back to the last time you spoke. It is very likely that both of you have left things on difficult terms. Sometimes an argument can get out of hand so much that one person storms out and, if there are two strong personalities involved, each may decide to wait for the other to make the first post-conflict move. Your girlfriend may just be simmering from the verbal spar the two of you had. If that’s the case, my best suggestion is that you wait at least a few days for her to resolve her feelings. Trying to get her to talk before she’s ready will likely only lead to more friction and misunderstandings, and you’ll get back to where you started with her ignoring you.
If your silence has been more gradual, it should be handled in a very different way. When a woman slowly withdraws from the man she is involved with, it is because she feels there is an emotional distance there. Just as some men don’t want to deal with the emotional ramifications of a confrontation about what’s missing in the relationship or what’s wrong with the connection, women don’t enjoy that either. Your girlfriend may feel that by slipping into the ether she will save you from the heartache that you would surely feel if she boldly told you that she is no longer so interested in you. You may see this as a cowardly way to end a relationship, but if you’re an emotional guy, she might see it as her only way to get out emotionally unscathed.
In any case, you cannot allow the woman you love to disappear without at least trying to understand her reasoning. Don’t make the mistake of approaching her with the attitude that you had no idea that she was not happy or satisfied. His silence is a sufficient indication that he is no longer getting what he needs from you. Let him know that you know he doesn’t feel like he used to and that he just wants to understand. Don’t get defensive and don’t try to explain anything at this point. This is your opportunity to share what you are experiencing and what you feel is lacking. If you handle this conversation from a place of understanding and compassion, he will see that you really want to hear what he has to say and you want to learn from it.
Reacting negatively when your girlfriend stops talking to you is the quickest route to a painful breakup with her. This is the woman you adore, so show her that this is what you feel. If you reach out to her and give her the support she needs to be honest with you about how she is currently feeling, she will open up and the deafening silence will be replaced by honesty and understanding.